To some guys, getting good with women means being able to seduce any woman, any time, any place.

That is not realistic and only makes getting better with women harder, not easier.

A few years ago I found some guys on the internet that claimed to be very good with women. Some of these guys claimed to be so good with women that they could get any woman, any time, any place.

In fact, one of those guys claimed that you can’t consider yourself good with women until you successfully seduce 10 women out of 10 women you approach.

In other words, in that guy’s eyes, you’ve got to be able to successfully seduce any woman you ever approach.

Back then I was just trying to figure out how to approach and start conversations with women, so setting my goal with women as 10 for 10 seemed like a pretty tough hill to climb.

That made meeting and talking to women that much harder for me because I felt like I couldn’t mess up at all.

Now, years later, and much more successful with women and dating, I can guarantee you that none of the guys claiming to be able to successfully seduce every woman they go after actually can. Not a single one of them.

How do I know this?

Even A-List Celebrities Get Rejected

There have been well publicized stories of A-list celebrities that have dated some of the most beautiful women in the world getting rejected by other women. One such example was when Colin Farrell got rejected by Meghan Lowther.

Colin Farrell has dated many gorgeous women, so considering even he, an A-list celebrity (or close enough), gets turned down occasionally, how could you hold yourself to the unreasonable standard of getting every woman you talk to?

The point is even men most women drool over get rejected occasionally.

To hold yourself to a standard that you have to get every woman you approach is not only unrealistic, it could be holding you back from dating the women you’re most attracted to because you’ll be afraid of failing with them.

Rather than approaching those women and knowing you might not be successful, you instead move on to women you are more likely to succeed with, but who aren’t as attractive as the other women you’re afraid to fail with.

Rejection Can Devour A Man’s Courage

You’re probably well aware of and accept the fact that you won’t get every woman you talk to. However, when you get rejected it still stings and consumes your thoughts for the rest of day, week, or even longer.

That feeling can eat you up inside and consume your thoughts to the point you end up not approaching other women.

When you let rejection get under your skin or psyche, it not only ruins the opportunities that come your way while you’re beating yourself up, but it also makes you shy or hesitate the next time you talk to a woman.

You end up getting in a protective mode where you do everything you can to avoid getting rejected, which ultimately means you don’t take any risks with a woman, such as asking for her number.

When that happens the fear of rejection rules your mind rather than thoughts of having fun with a woman, playfully teasing her, and attracting her.

When fear of rejection becomes so bad it rules your mind, it can screw up a lot of opportunities you have with new women and also prevent you from getting to the next level with women you’re currently dating.

Moving Beyond Rejection

The take-home lesson is to be comfortable getting rejected from time to time because it will happen. If you never get rejected, you’re not talking to enough women or you’re not talking to hot women. Period.

If you haven’t dated very much you’ll probably get rejected more at first, but you can use those early rejections as guide posts that show you what not to do the next time.

Think of rejection as free coaching from hot women on the topic of what not to do with them.

As you get better with women you’ll experience less and less rejection. However, you still must accept that rejection will bare its face sooner or later, and there’s nothing wrong with that.

If you’ve been holding off on emailing the women you’re really attracted to on dating sites because you have a feeling you’ll instantly get blown out, email those women anyway. Take a chance and learn from the experience.

You’ll end up dating some fantastic women that most guys are afraid to talk to or email, and you’ll also learn not what to do as well. It’s a win-win situation.

Brandon Duran

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This entry was posted on June 14, 2010 at June 14, 2010 and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.