This is one of the most important concepts to understand when it comes to getting better with women – making new mistakes, and learning from them, will help you get better with women quicker than almost anything else you can do.

Most guys do they exact opposite when trying to get better with women – they do the same things over and over that aren’t working, but continue doing them anyway.

Doing everything you can to avoid making mistakes will make you weaker in relationships with women.

You will do little things that tell a woman you’re deathly afraid of losing her. This of course makes you less attractive in a woman’s eyes because you end up looking insecure and needy.

Nothing Happens Until Something Moves

Even if you’re not sure what to do in a situation, making the wrong move is usually better than not making any move at all.

Making the wrong move helps you get better because you’ll continually be pointed in the right direction. You’ll learn what works and what doesn’t, and because you’re learning by doing, those lessons will stick with you.

While reading Cashflow Quadrant by Robert Kiyosaki, I came across a passage that relates perfectly to my point about making mistakes.

Most people think, but they never do. If you do something, you make mistakes, and it’s from our mistakes that we learn the most. Remember that anything important cannot really be learned in the classroom. It must be learned by taking action, making mistakes, and then correcting them. That is when wisdom sets in.

Here is another quote from Cashflow Quadrant about learning from your mistakes:

[Successful investors] have a long track record of winning on a consistent basis, and they have had enough losses that give them the wisdom that only comes from making mistakes and learning from them.

The points Robert made and the lesson I’m conveying is you must become comfortable with making mistakes. It is those mistakes that will teach you what to do and what not to do in order to get what you want.

Fumbling on the One Yard Line

I remember a few years ago when I was making a lot of mistakes on my way to getting better at meeting and dating women. There were lots of fumbles on the one yard line, but those mistakes were more valuable to me than if I had lucked my way into success rather than earning it.

There is a saying you may have heard that goes something like this, “Steady seas make bad sailors.”

If you luck your way into a relationship with a beautiful woman and she leaves you, you won’t know how to get another woman in your life. And that crushes the self-esteem of some guys for years or even a lifetime.

But if you earned your success with women by making and learning from mistakes, you’ll know what to do to get another beautiful woman in your life.

If you’re making a lot of mistakes right now, rather than getting frustrated, realize it is the lessons you’re learning right now that will point you in the right direction to success with women.

I’m not saying to make random mistakes just to learn from them. Rather, use your experience to make the best call and then take action even if you’re not sure you’re making the right move or not.

If you get what you want, continue down that path. If not, go back a step or two before things fell apart and try something different the next time you’re in a similar situation.

How to Get Here Yourself

In my articles I give you lessons that were critical to my journey in getting better with women. I made a lot of mistakes on my way to learning these lessons.

By reading my articles you’ll grasp the lesson, but it’s not until you experience the lesson yourself that you’ll learn it.

So go try some new things. If you’re putting in an honest effort but still aren’t getting any results, try something completely different.

It was the times where I was stuck scratching my head the hardest that I tried some oddball approach that ended up working.

And if you’re almost where you want to be with women but you keep “fumbling on the one yard line,” keep pushing because you’re probably much closer than you think.

Make some new mistakes and let me know it goes. And if you can’t get passed a particular hurdle, let me know that too.

Brandon Duran

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This entry was posted on February 5, 2011 at 1:28 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.