If you hate approaching, online dating gives you a solid way to meet women, but I still recommend trying to overcome approach anxiety. It will help you become more comfortable and confident with women when you meet them in person after meeting them on dating sites.

If you have already tried approaching, and it just gives you more and more anxiety, then at least you tried. But to not try because of irrational fears isn’t a good excuse for not trying. Facing your fear in a smart way helps you grow in ways you would never expect, and it also decreases fear or anxiety in other areas of your life too.

I used to have approach anxiety pretty bad a few years ago. My simple solution was having a solid routine stack (three or four interesting stories that get laughs and catch women’s attention) that would keep a conversation going for a few minutes even if a woman or group of women didn’t say much in return. I would then go out at least four nights per week and approach approximately ten to twelve separate groups of women.

I gave myself permission to bomb every time if need be, but I had to approach. I wouldn’t go home for the night until I had approached my ten to twelve groups. Sometimes I would have to go to multiple venues if one venue staled out or if there weren’t enough people there.

By following the above blueprint (I think I first heard it from Mystery) I was able to get very comfortable approaching after just a few weeks. I kept approaching and going out four to six nights a week for months (which I no longer do because I meet more than enough women from dating sites to keep me busy), and to this day, I don’t get much anxiety when approaching. Sometimes my heart will beat faster, but I now see that as exciting rather than fear-inducing.

Feel free to subscribe to my free newsletter if you want more tactics on meeting women on dating sites.

Later,

Brandon Duran

Thank you!

However, the last few weeks, maybe even month, I’ve noticed a dip in my response rates. I’ve also noticed an increase in the amount of women who have flaked.

Many of the women I talk to are in college or are teachers, and the end of the school year is a very busy time for them. Many of the women have even told me how busy they have been with school.

I’m expecting an increase in responses this month and the rest of the summer though. If I notice something off, I’ll look more into it and post an article about it.

Thanks for the question.

Brandon Duran

It looks like you’re getting decent response rates to your emails. Keep improving piece by piece and you’ll improve your overall conversion.

It might take you a month or two, but it will definitely be worth it because you’ll be able to send out those emails again and again to meet more women.

Brandon Duran